Real Author Things

I am now twelve days away from publication and something horrible has happened. I’ve started to feel like a little bit of a fraud. Now that the release is so close, my book is starting to appear in places, like on the publisher’s website, Amazon and it’s down as currently being read by Chloe on I love seeing it around, obviously, but every time I see it side by side with ‘real’ books I instantly feel like one of the Young Pretenders (history reference; may as well use my A-Level for something) I feel like someone’s going to come up to me and say “Hang on a minute, why is your book here alongside the proper ones?” I’m not imagining that they actually would say that of course – I’d be mortified if anyone did – but how do I know that people aren’t thinking it??? I suppose this feeling is a mixture of everything being so new and unfamiliar, plus the fact that it’s been nearly a year since the original publishing offer came through, and over that time all the progress is ‘behind the scenes’ as it were. Apart from seeing the proofs I wasn’t really involved in the production so the whole thing takes on an air of unreality. Now all of a sudden my books have arrived, posters have been printed and the publicity is starting to appear. And it all feels very strange, as if I’m playing at being a writer and someone will spot the imposter soon. I don’t know what it will take to change it. Maybe success? Maybe a longer period of time?

I know that I’m not alone in this because I’ve just had an email from a fellow author friend and in it she mentioned what a novelty and how exciting it is communicate about ‘real author things’, and it’s true! It is very exciting to talk about publishing, launches, front cover design and royalties. So exciting that we devote approximately 1-2 lines per email to ‘real author things’, and the rest revolves around diets, children and making plans to do lunch. However I do have faith in her as a writer, her emails are amusing, sharp and open which makes me want to read her book, called The Secret Diary of a New Mum, Aged 43 ¼, which is published in February, see here for details: Joking aside, it is nice to have someone to chat to about this publishing thing who understands the ins and outs and vagaries of being a writer. Whilst also trying to be a mother and housewife, otherwise known as being a general servant.

This blog post will not be a long one because I am quite tired today after going to an engagement party last night (Steph – she who stared at vaginas – and Rob are getting married. This announcement followed swiftly after the vagina-staring incident. You may draw your own conclusions). I am also writing it whilst simultaneously having a conversation with my eldest daughter about the relative pros and cons of a gymnastics birthday party versus a Build A Bear birthday party. Oh the traumas of turning nine. Her deciding factors are: fun, how many friends she can take and how long she can make the party last. Her father’s deciding factor is cost. So we’ve been through every single plus and minus point in detail, several times, and I think we’ve eventually arrived at the conclusion that a gymnastics party would be better, with a trip to the Build A Bear shop as a birthday treat. Both, in other words. Her father will be delighted.

As those of you on my facebook fan page will know, my book launch invitations have arrived! They were done very quickly for me, which suited my now now now mentality, so all I have to do is complete my guest list and post them. This is one of the last tasks that awaits me before the launch – I can’t believe how quickly the last eight or so weeks have gone! Before I know it, it will be time to start working properly on Book 2. I did have an urge to do that today actually, but it wore off pretty quickly in favour of reading The Sunday Times. I do love Camilla Long, even if her heels look like they could take your eye out. Oooh, mentioning heels, I like this time of year because my summer wardrobe must take a backseat and my winter one must be updated. Which means New Shoes! I plan to buy them in time for the launch, if they have been manufactured by then. I am very specific about what I want – and my husband is very specific about how much I can spend; I fear that one of us will have to give way. You may place bets on who it will be.

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